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If Taken in Hand stands as a good model for a relationship between two people who want that, it stands on its own, without needing to put down egalitarian, nondisciplinary relationships. It's when I hear the put downs of the more mainstream type of relationship, that I begin to wonder why Taken in Handers would need to bolster themselves that way. You may hear me putdown the mainstream type of relationship because it turned out disastrously for me. I went that route simply because, as far as I knew, that was the only item on the menu. I didn't know I had a choice, so I settled for something less than what I wanted. I dreamed of what I wanted, but I thought I couldn't have it because it was a social taboo. I am strongly tempted to launch into an angry tirade over this, but I have already posted my negative feelings here many times about how my acceptance of the mainstream had an adverse effect on my life.

I have no argument with those who have successfully made such relationships work. What I do object to is the brainwashing that society inflicts upon us telling us we have no other choice.

KrosRogue?

Submitted by KrosRogue? on Wed, 21/04/2004 - 05:06. Login or register to post comments Lose the Guilt I couldn't agree more. Society is great at making us feel guilty when we don't fit the norm.

Submitted by Mousling on Sun, 30/05/2004 - 12:14. Login or register to post comments Equal isn't all it's cracked up to be I was slightly puzzled by the reference to the film 'Dentists' which I haven't seen anyway, but I gather the reviewer disapproves of the man in the film because - shock horror! - he does half the hosuework (gasp!) Considering both he and his wife have full-time jobs, I should jolly well hope he WOULD do half the hosuework, why shouldn't he? Is this what Taken In Hand means, that a wife should be her husband's slave? My husband's always done a lot of housework, still does, even though I don't work at all, I can't say it's affected his masculinity; why should it? And why on earth does a marriage have to be like a SHIP, for goodness sake? I mean, that dominant/submission thing is a lot of fun, but surely it becomes a bore if you do it ALL the time. I mean, surely even Taken In Hand wives aren't so poor-spirited that they don't sometimes want to do just what they like, and think for themselves? ("The thing that all women most desire is their own way"as it says in Sir Gawain and the Loathly Lady). Surely Taken In Hand husbands get tired of laying down the law ALL the time, and just want their wives to get on with it? Do all Taken In Hand husbands want to be authoritarian ALL the 01:36:01 If so, why don't they join the Navy and have done with it? Doesn't it get rather exhausting keeping it up all the time. My husband doesn't mind doing the dominant male thing, but a lot of the time he just wants to get on with things: like the chap in Secretary, sometimes he's just too busy!


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Last-modified: 2021-12-04 (土) 01:36:01 (364d)